When one of your girlfriends or family members asks you to be a bridesmaid in their wedding, it truly is a great honour. She is asking you stand up with her and bear witness to her marriage to the love of her life. She is also asking you to help her realize her dreams for her special day. However, when you encounter either a Bridezilla or a clueless bride, your job as a bridesmaid can become a little bit difficult. Every woman is different, as are her wedding ideals, but there are a few tips to keep in mind for when you’re asked to be a bridesmaid.
If you don’t know, ask.
Depending on what the bride’s plans are for her wedding, there could be a variety of things she needs help with. Part of the responsibility is assisting the bride in achieving her vision. However, you may deal with a bride who doesn’t want to come out and ask for help; either because she doesn’t want to be a burden, or she believes you should just know when you need to start contributing. Take the time to send her a text, or call her every now and then, and simply ask if there is anything you can help her with. Let her know when you are available to stop by in case she has a task that she can’t complete by herself. You don’t want to run into a situation where the bride begins to doubt how much you care because you haven’t taken the initiative to display your willingness to help.
Do not complain about the dress.
This issue has torn apart bridal parties, when it really shouldn’t be an issue at all. Of course, we all want to feel comfortable and confident, especially when we know we’re going to have lots of pictures taken of us. However, when it comes to a bridesmaid dress, what the bride envisions should not be questioned. It is not our job to drop jaws; we are there to support our friend or family member. We have a right to be honest with the bride on what our favorite choices are, or what we feel best in, but ultimately it’s next to impossible to satisfy every member of a group of women with different bodies, different tastes, and different budgets. As long as the bride is reasonable in terms of something like a budget, which we can’t change, a bridesmaid should be able to just grin and bear whatever questionable dress or ensemble the bride chooses (as hard as it may be sometimes) because at the end of the day, everyone will really only care about what she’s wearing.
Shopping for bridesmaid dresses can be a challenge, but we’ve created a guide to make the process easy and fun.
Remember it’s not about you.
A wedding is meant to be a celebration of two people who found love and want to make a commitment to each other in front of people who are special to them. It’s not meant to be a runway show, a dating pool, or a social (although there is usually a party involved). Try to push your personal opinions aside when you possibly disagree with the bride or groom, their family involvement, or the overall itinerary of the wedding. Again, you are there to support the bride, not fill your own agenda or be the centre of attention.
Planning a wedding can be very stressful, especially when you factor in budgets, family expectations, trying to please everyone, and juggling multiple responsibilities. While you don’t need to accept abuse or an over-the-top Bridezilla, try to understand how the multitude of emotions the bride may experience may be making her a little bit on edge. If it’s possible to take some of the burden off of her, try your best to do that. Remember that she’s trying to please herself and everyone else and create a perfect wedding, which is next to impossible in many situations.
Do you have any advice for bridesmaids, or want to share a bridesmaid horror story? Share with us in the comments below.
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Image 1 courtesy of Pink Elephant Cards
Image 4 courtesy of Amoeba blog